Halflife Crisis

You always hear about one having a mid life crisis. Say you live until you are 80. Um that makes your crisis at age 40. Maybe it's me but does someone really only go through a "mid life crisis" once in their lifetime? Seriously? Kudos to that individual.

As a PROUD "Mormon Mommy" I find myself having one of those crisis moments today. I'm only 24 years old ( almost 25) ugh writing that makes me realize how young I really am... and I have 3 beautiful babies. Oh and I've been married for 3 1/2 years. Putting it down on paper makes me realize how I prob shouldn't complain because really for 1. I'm still young. and  2. I still have a lot going for me. Reading my old posts about looking for a house sent me into a mode. Quarter life. crisis. mommy. mode.

Finding myself worrying about loans and money and the future and making a life for myself and while wining the race would be great, right now I'd just like to be a contender! I know what youre thinking- "what is she talking about?? making a life for herself?? I know I'm stirring up someone. Ok. Let me explain. I'm a stay at home mom 24/7. While I ABSOLUTELY love my "job" and my kids I couldn't really ask for more. doting husband who works hard to make sure I can stay  as well. However don't you every find yourself wondering what else??

Living an Auto pilot. I wanna spice up my life a little. Is it too much to ask? I would love to be known as someone else besides "mommy" i love being called mommy most days with their sweet little voices however...One of my biggest dreams since as long as I can remember was to be a photographer. I finally have a decent camera and I am getting better. Now while I could never make it a living given as there are so many more talented ladies out there and let's face it where I love you have photographers everywhere you look.All those mommy's who realized their dream a long time ago. Now it's a dog eat dog carreer. 

I would also LOVE a house. My own home. Where I can paint and decorate. Until then I will settle for this basement apartment house hole that we love in. It does us good. Family members live upstairs so there is always someone there for ya. Bittersweet topic it is for me since we were on that mortgage path once a blue moon ago but ended suddenly when no name got cold feet and decided to change careers. So now we start over. And the wait begins again. It's not keeping up with the Jones's by any means. 

MORE RANT TO COME.... tune in again.
Bring on the criticism.